Author Archives: caverns of my mind

My Words as Weapons: Armed for Battle

Posted on November 20, 2013 by caverns of my mind

A few posts back, I reasserted my battle cry to wage war on human trafficking, to brandish my sword.  How exactly am I to do that?  What exactly is my metaphorical sword?  I’m a writer, so obviously it’s my words.  I’d love to swoop in, wearing a fancy cape and mask, take out all the human traffickers with some sort of non-human special ability, and bring all those enslaved to safety (and given the chance, I would), but realistically, at least for now, my best way to fight is to inform others.  The more people know, the more they can do.  The more aware we are, the more we can prevent.  From here on out, my focus-less blog will have a clear focus at least once a week, Wednesdays. I may use the chance to reflect some thoughts on human trafficking, to highlight various organizations, or just record some basic facts. The rest of the week I’ll continue to be all over with my thoughts.

Today’s focus: Prevention

Because so few people still have an understanding of what human trafficking actually is (modern day slavery), even fewer people realize it is not just one of those things that is happening to other people in other parts of the world.  It is a frightening fact that human trafficking is happening here in our own part of the world, and it could happen to people we know, because so many are uninformed.  It doesn’t matter if you live in a big city, the suburb, or the sticks; human trafficking is likely closer to you than you think.

Image borrowed from FCAHT

Image borrowed from FCAHT

I live in Florida and discovered The Coalition Against Human Trafficking, based out of Central Florida.  After liking them on Facebook, when I scan my news feed, I now come across articles they share about human trafficking rings all over Central Florida, some in small towns, and some even run by teenagers!  Some unbelievable stuff is happening right in my own back yard, so there’s a good chance it’s happening where you are too.  I don’t say this to cause fear.  I say this to create awareness.  Just because something is ignored does not mean it does not exist.  It’s much better to be aware of it in order to prevent it from happening to the people in our own lives, even if some are not willing to extend much beyond themselves to stop the issue. Just reaching out to those who are close can make a difference.

I cringe, pray, and cry a little every time I see a notification of a young missing girl because I know there’s a very good chance she has fallen victim to human trafficking in some form.  It truly breaks my heart.  One reason the number of victims to human trafficking can only be an estimate is because so many just disappear.  The thing about young girls is that they never think these things will happen to them and they aren’t always as careful as they should be.  Some of them don’t realize they even have anything to fear, so they have no idea they are even in danger.  That’s why I am happy to see over the last few years that many organizations are beginning to create and implement awareness and prevention curriculum for the young people in our society.  It’s a start.

I found this random PDF with some tips on what to look for and how to protect yourself and loved ones.  It seems to somehow be connected with the Not for Sale organization.

Click here to find a way stay informed and/or become involved in the fight.

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Anybody Remember Thanksgiving?

Posted on November 18, 2013 by caverns of my mind

Save Thanksgiving!

thanksgiving turkey

In the midst of the rampant running commercialism of Christmas, it appears many Americans are now willing to skip Thanksgiving altogether in favor of sales where they will still overspend and pay the interest on said purchases for years to come (hence, they will really only have the immediate illusion that they have saved money). Last year Robert and I bought running shoes the day before Thanksgiving and saw people already camping out in front of the neighboring Best Buy for the sales the next evening (no, we weren’t trying to find a sale on the shoes either- we just needed new ones and were in the area).  They were completely willing to skip a lovely holiday meal with their families in order to be the first to get whatever piece of electronic equipment they had lived without all the time before that. And don’t get me started on how unfair it is that the people who work in retail are expected to happily forgo their family time in order to please the greedy masses.  Some blame Target, but Target was simply the host to the parasites.

This year, and for the last few years, Christmas began the day after Halloween (the greedier corporations began even before that), and Thanksgiving seems to have suffocated somewhere between tacky witches that appear to be flying into trees or houses and even tackier gigantic blow up yard snow globes with dancing penguins or hippy Santa Clauses.

I love Christmas.  It’s always been my favorite holiday, but in its rightful time and place, because Thanksgiving is an important American holiday.  The more commercial Christmas becomes, the more the true reason for the holiday is forgotten (many read “Jesus is the reason for the season” on Christmas cards but give it no thought or ignore it in lieu of getting presents), and the same and worse seems to be happening to Thanksgiving.  Christmas has merely been distorted; Thanksgiving is being forgotten.

In school, we learned that Thanksgiving was about pilgrims and Native Americans (but they were still referred to as Indians when I was in school) getting together and having a celebration of crops.  Ok, kinda true, but that explanation skips the whole idea of whom they were actually giving thanks to.  Yes, God again.  He pops up in all kinds of holidays, and is systematically removed from most of them.  Even Easter is questionable these days, and seriously, how can the purpose of that holiday be ignored or covered over? A fluffy white rabbit delivers candy?  God gets covered over because so many people want an excuse to have a celebration, but they don’t want the pesky reminders of the truth.  I’m not going to write a diatribe here; just pointing it out and moving on.

Thanksgiving was permanently established as a national holiday in 1941 to be celebrated on the fourth Thursday of each November, but it has been celebrated in various ways for the last four centuries.  Should we throw that all away now?  I like Lincoln’s words:

We often forget the Source from which the blessings of fruitful years and healthful skies come… No human wisdom hath devised nor hath any mortal hand worked out these great things.  They are the gracious gifts of the Most High God… I therefore invite my fellow-citizens in every part of the United States… to observe the last Thursday of November as a day of thanksgiving and praise to our beneficent Father who dwelleth in the heavens.

We have so much to be thankful for.  Let us not forget where it comes from and cherish the time we have to gather with our families and friends.  Savor this time and think on your blessings before you move on to Christmas.

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NaNoWriMo NoThanQ

Posted on November 12, 2013 by caverns of my mind

I’ve heard people say that “everyone has a good book inside them.” That may be true, but many of those people should have somebody else write it for them.

writing novel

November has charged in with its National Novel Writing Month (NaNoWriMo) challenge for people to write an entire novel in just one month…because apparently writing a novel is just so easy that anyone can do it in thirty days.

Personally, I am insulted by this implication.  I understand the idea of sending out hope and motivation, and some people need a little shove, but the message received by many is that writing a novel is quick and easy; in fact, it can be done in one’s free time in as little as a month.  At least February wasn’t the month chosen, but couldn’t it at least have been a month with thirty-one days?  Heck, you could probably write a sequel then too.

Because I have written a book, I have had a few people ask me questions about or make suggestions along the line that now that NaNoWriMo is here, I can finally finish the sequel I’ve been writing since late June, as if all I needed was for it to finally be November, the magical writing month.  Sure, I’d like to have had my book finished and edited in July, but I’m happy with my pace.  I like to really feel my story and my words, not force them into existence just so they will, well, exist.  They may not be the right words.  No thank you NaNoWriMo, I would rather take my time to get it right.

I’ve never given this whole ordeal much thought in the past.  It’s like American Idol, right?  Everybody thinks they can sing, and everybody thinks they can write too. But I’ve watched the train wreck of Idol auditions, as most people have, simply for the entertainment of how horrible the performances can be, and how seriously the “singers” think they have talent.

NaNoWriMo is the Hunger Games of writing, in a sense, with the unprepared and untrained warriors.  No, nobody is killing anyone off.  It isn’t really a competition.  But maybe it actually is.  Think about it.  What will happen after all these one month novels are written?  Many people will likely choose to self publish them, flooding an already densely populated pool with novice novels.  Some of them may even be good with some editing, but how will anyone find them with so much to pick through?  So, in essence, these NaNoWriMo novels will dilute the quality of indie published works, making it that much more difficult to gain respect and credibility for the serious writers who know it takes longer than thirty days to write something  we can consider true literary quality.

My melodramatic summary if NaNoWriMo: It does little more than rape the seriousness and respect of true authors’ hard work.  Of course, these are just my opinions, and you don’t need to agree with me, even though I’m right.  I even know a few people participating in this writing challenge, and some are legit writers, but it goes against my personal principles as a writer.

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Christmas in October, a Peek at Drew’s Freshman Year

Posted on November 8, 2013 by caverns of my mind

Chrsitmas in October

While many people are attempting to write a book in one month, I’m admittedly a bit slower.  I’ve been working on my sequel to Memoirs of an Ordinary Girl: The Middle-ish Ages since June, and I’m not halfway there yet.  I’m ok with that as I would rather take my time on this project.  I have mixed feelings about the continuing story of my heroine Drew, and I just want to get it right and keep the integrity of her character, even as she stares high school in the face.  She will not be tainted by the horrors of teenage angst!

To prove that life does go on for Drew, here’s an uncorrected excerpt from Drew’s Halloween.  Remember, the year is 1991.

Christmas in October

My friends and I all met at Joey’s Pizza Palace the Saturday night before Halloween so we could plan our attire for the day and for the collection of goodies that night.  We all landed on the theme idea of Christmas, mostly at the prodding of Adrienne and me, who had recently amassed a collection of crazy Christmas socks and planned on wearing them as often as possible.  We only had until Thursday to gather our costumes, and none of us could drive, so we had to be resourceful, and this seemed like a theme we could pull off.

Amid the scary masks and cutesie prep costumes, the red and green splendor my friends and I brought to campus was jolly indeed.  Since Adrienne and I had been wearing our Christmas socks for about a month already anyway, we knew we had to add color and accessories.  I wore red leggings under a pair of black shorts and a green silk blouse hanging loose over that.  I couldn’t decide between my dancing reindeer or Frosty socks, so I wore one of each.  Adrienne and I had both streaked our hair with alternating green and red food coloring stripes, wore wreath earrings, and decorative garland as boas.  When my friends all gathered together that morning we all had to congratulate Anne for actually showing up dressed as a Christmas tree, adorned with ornaments, lights, and strung together popcorn.  “Excellent costume. Nice trunk,” Shane said as he pulled off a piece of popcorn, tossed it up and caught it in his mouth.

Anne tried to playfully slap his hand, but without full range of motion, she simply swatted at air.  “Don’t eat my popcorn, Shane.”

“Yeah, ok.  It’s a little stale anyway, I think,” he replied, gagging a little for effect.

By lunchtime, Anne had only a few random kernels of popcorn hanging on.  “I kid you not.  A bird dive-bombed me when I was walking between buildings.  I will never wear food again.”

Halloween is pretty much an eat junk and do nothing in school day, so my good mood could not be ruined, not even by Chip and Mr. Bunson or Mona and Violet.  I had gotten back my first set of journals for Ms. Finch’s class and received an A and an encouraging note about my writing talent potential.  It was a good day.

Mona was wearing a New Kids on the Block t-shirt with a balloon stuffed underneath.  We made regretful eye contact when I entered chorus.  “Ugh- what a scary costume ya’ll have’on. Yer givin’ me th’ begeevers, yer mask is sooo frightnen’!”

“Ugh- your insult is sooo unoriginal.  And what the heck are you anyway?” I asked, because in spite of myself, I was curious.

“Jordan Knight’s preggers wiyfe, obviously,” Mona exclaimed, holding up her left hand and flitting her ring finger at me, on which she had placed a silly plastic dress-up ring.  I hated to admit it, but it was original.  So I only admitted it silently and to myself.  Audibly, I simply grunted acknowledgement as I turned and flung my silver tinsel garland over my shoulder, purposely hitting Mona in the face with it.

While I scanned the costumes in the room after entering photography, Freddy Krueger snuck in behind me and placed his creepy blade-fingers, which were thankfully just plasticy-rubber, on my shoulder.

“Dustin?  That better be you, so I can punch you.”

“You don’t like my costume?”

“Freddy gave me nightmares and I never once visited his creepy Elm Street either.  I hate horror movies!”

“You’re pretty passionate about it.”

“Yes.  Just the previews to those movies always freak me out, and there’s a poster up at the video store where his eyes follow you around,” I shivered.

Dustin laughed a bit at my misfortune.  “Sorry. I was trying to decide between Freddy Krueger or Freddie Mercury, but I was out of wife beaters and spandex, and I already had this dingy red and black striped shirt.  And it looks like you both, what, robbed the Polar Express?” he added, indicating Adrienne and I with a wave of his hand.

“Something like that,” she responded with a smile, pressing a button on her reindeer necklace that started playing “Rudolph the Red Nosed Reindeer.”

(Just in case you’re wondering, yeah it’s copyrighted.)

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Brandishing, No, Wielding My Sword

Posted on November 6, 2013 by caverns of my mind

Yeah, I like the connotation of wield better than that of brandish.  One is just waving a weapon in a menacing fashion, like a threat.  But the other implies the action of actually using a weapon.

I don’t want to just threaten like a child playing a game.  I want to actually kick some butt!  In this case, human trafficking.  I will draw my sword, advance, and fight, wielding said sword, and draw blood.

Warrior Woman Silhouette

I’m not a girlie girl.  I’ve said that before.  Don’t get me wrong; I’ll watch a chick flick, but I’m not going to spend the extra money to see one in a theater.  Only the most epic tales of courage and awesome special effects warrant taking out the small loan needed to pay for a trip to a movie theater these days. These have always been my favorite stories, where a lone hero, or a small band of friends or warriors takes on something much bigger than themselves, even when it seems impossible.

I’ve said before that we should never stop fighting just because human trafficking is such a daunting and formidable foe, yet that’s what I have done.  Not on purpose.  I didn’t realize I had given up the fight, but looking over my actions over the last few months, I see I have done very little to advance the cause, and

I am ashamed.

I intended to use some of my new found time in researching, promoting, and finding ways I can help. Instead, I read a book, started following some organizations on Twitter, and nothing else.

I am declaring it now.  I am recommitting to the cause, to the helpless victims who are suffering, to the vulnerable who need awareness and prevention.  I am recommitting to JUSTICE.

I’m a quiet person, locked inside myself most often, until I see injustice.  It stirs and moves me, igniting a passionate flame in my heart that burns so deeply I know I cannot contain it.

This is what I’m meant to do.  This is what my warrior’s heart is meant to battle, and it doesn’t matter that I’m smaller than human trafficking, because I plan to spread this fire in my back yard and worldwide.  This is a foe worth fighting.

Proverbs 31:8-9

Speak up for those who cannot speak for themselves; ensure justice for those being crushed.

Yes, speak up for the poor and helpless, and see that they get justice.

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What’s so Great about the Pumpkin Anyway? (Embracing My Birthday) or I Got a Rock!

Posted on October 31, 2013 by caverns of my mind

I got a rock

I tried to let it go in last year’s rant, “My Spooktacular Birthday.”  Now that I’m turning 29 for the eight time, I really should just learn to embrace my birthday being on Halloween.  Maybe I need therapy…in the form of chocolate.

Ah, yes, chocolate.  Now that is one good thing about having my birthday on Halloween.  When I was a kid, once people realized they had forgotten my birthday in the excitement of Halloween candy and costumes, I often got guilt chocolate.  Sometimes teachers would make sure I got extra cookies if we did class Halloween parties.  This part was acceptable. Here are some other acceptable byproducts of having a Halloween birthday.

Autumn has always been my favorite time of year.  The weather is usually quite comfortable- warmish during the day, with a slight chill in the evening.

I look good in fall colors.

It’s the Great Pumpkin, Charlie Brown and Garfield’s Halloween Adventure specials.

One year, my mom, my oldest sister, and I had a Lethal Weapon marathon (this was when there were only three).  That has nothing to do with my birthday being on Halloween, but just shows they loved me enough to do what I wanted to do that day.

I can play dress up on my birthday and not look like an idiot.

My birthday isn’t on Christmas. I can’t imagine having to compete with baby Jesus on my birthday.

I know I can now count on Facebook to remind everyone and even suggest they all give me gifts.

This year, I vow to really let it go and embrace the day (though I really wish all calendars had “Terri’s Birthday” printed on them instead of “Halloween.”  Mine does.  My very smart husband had ours custom made.

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Get a Haircut and Get a Real Job…or maybe just a bunch of hats

Posted on October 21, 2013 by caverns of my mind

job

Since the time I was sixteen, which is more than half my lifetime ago, I’ve had a job, except for about a month right after I graduated from college and got married.  But I left the teaching profession in June, so now when I meet people and they ask the dreaded, “What do you do for a living?” I freeze.  I don’t have a “real” job, yet I have many jobs.  Confused yet?  Yeah, me too.

Robert and I discussed recently that I should tell people I’m an author, which I am.  That’s not exactly a huge money maker for me…yet, but I wrote a book (Memoirs and an Ordinary Girl: The Middle-ish Ages) and am currently writing a sequel, so I’m an author.

I also still work for the school district as a very picky substitute.  I will only work in my former school, and I turn down the gym class, ESE, and math gigs.  I do feel a bit like since I was a teacher, I’ll always sort of be a teacher (this week I will sub a class with a majority of students I had two years ago).  The kids still think of me as a teacher and I still get contacted for letter of recommendation requests, and even the ones I’ve allowed as friends on Facebook still call me Mrs. Harper.

Then I was lucky enough to be in the right place at the right time and got myself into a job where I get to travel, deprive myself of sleep, lift and move heavy objects, and have a blast with some of the most interesting and joyous people I’ve ever met by working some race events for The Color Run (the happiest 5k on the planet).  It’s sort of like a contract work job though, because I work when I’m needed, so it’s not exactly a steady income for me.

I’m a horrible salesperson.  This is why I hate plugging my book and tend to be so awkward at it. I once sold Mary Kay, but not much and not for long.  Then I signed up to be a Compassion Entrepreneur with Trades of Hope because the money generated from these hand made products goes to paying the artisans (women in otherwise destitute and desperate living conditions) fair wages and empowerment.  I think my mom is my biggest customer, but I’m working on it (Thanks Mom!)

I don’t have a “real” job, and I’ve never been happier.  I’m not always sure how much money I can bring in for our household budget each month, but I leave it up to God.  He knows what we need and our needs are always met.  I’m stress free and now have time to give more of myself since I cannot just give money.  On Sunday, I signed up to volunteer at a few local outreaches and I cannot wait to get started, to give of my time, and to touch and change lives, directly or indirectly.  I always wanted to be able to do more, and now I finally can.  Serving others is a blessing in itself.  I’m not saying everybody should quit their jobs and start doing volunteer work, but if you can squeeze in time at any local charity even once a month, I’m certain you will feel gratified in what you do.

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Terri’s BIG Adventure

Posted on October 18, 2013 by caverns of my mind

My big adventure involved a bike.

pee wees bikeNo, not that bike.  This bike:

old school huffy

My one-speed Huffy.  I’m old school like that.  I believe in keeping it simple.  That’s why I basically stopped playing video games once they got more complicated than this.

Atari game system

Yep.  I didn’t take to the idea of a smart phone right away either.  I’m not afraid of technology, but I don’t really see my need for most of it.  I don’t have time to take classes to learn how to use these things.  Seriously, we rented a car for a recent job I had and the owner’s manual was only a few pages thicker than the manual on how to operate the in-dash navigation, music, blah, blah, blah system.  Ugh!  Not for me.  I figure out how to do the basics and leave it at that, because I’m happy with just that.

And now I have gone far down a rabbit-hole.  Back to that BIG adventure.  Ok, maybe it wasn’t so big after all, but I think there’s a lesson in it.

I am training for a half marathon, my first half marathon actually.  First of many or the one and only?  We will see when December rolls around.  I’m in week five of my twelve week training program and since I began this I have encountered what is a new obstacle in my running experience of the last three years- shin splints.  It’s really just my left shin, so I guess it’s just a shin splint, singular.  Anyway, whatever it is, it’s uncomfortable and I don’t like it.  Every time it seems to vanish, it tries to sneak back up on me.  Creeper!  The last two runs I did this week were really fast for me as of late, which I was proud of, but the phantom shin splint had once again taken hold, so after the previous day’s speedwork training, I realized I probably needed to take a day off before my long run day of eight miles.  But a day off that was not scheduled felt like a wimpy cop-out, so I decided to go for a bike ride instead.

Where I live, we have many walking and riding trails that connect at various parks and such.  It’s really a beautiful area and it happily encourages the many older people of this once primarily retirement community to remain active.  And then there are the younger people like me who also get to enjoy this beautiful fall weather (in Florida that means we no longer feel as though we will melt when we walk outside further than the mailbox).

So I’m riding along, enjoying the peacefulness, smiling at and good morninging the other pedestrians and cyclers, admiring Bambi’s mom as she runs across the trail a mere ten feet ahead of me, and then I’m coasting along with a disconnected bike chain.  I pulled my bike off the trail and attempted to reattach the chain.  How hard could it be?  And it wasn’t so bad getting the chain back up on the large gear, but the little one was not cooperating.  I tend to be clueless in these matters, but I sure wanted to give it a try.  Secretly, however, I was hoping for a more Disney movie scenario, where the deer would come back and somehow be able to either help me fix the bike, or give me a lift home.  Neither occurred.  I had been riding for almost six miles and the distance between this spot and my home was probably only about three more miles or so back, and since I was capable, and I had no other choice, I began to walk my bike home.

I don’t often ask for help from strangers, and I probably wouldn’t have known how to ask the deer either, so even as I saw a few friendly faces along the way, I kept walking.  It wasn’t so bad because it was a gorgeous setting and the weather was clear and as brisk as it can be around 75 degrees.  Then thoughts began to turn to my impatience.  Some time back, while I was still a high-strung teacher, an inconvenience such as this would have been a huge dilemma and I’d be muttering under my breath because it would now take me longer to get home.  After all, it’s not like I could run…with a bike.  I had to walk.  Then I remembered a tee shirt my husband I and should have bought when we had the chance because one can no longer buy this treasure- I’ve looked.

if I stop running

Obviously the same case applied to walking, but it would just take longer.  Patience is important and it’s something I’m learning about.  Instead of growling at squirrels or stomping my feet, I figured the walking was still good cross training for my shin since it wasn’t hurting and I resolved to enjoy the beauty around me.  And so I walked 1.1 miles until an older gentleman asked if my bike was broken.  I told him my chain had come loose and I couldn’t quite get it back on.  He stepped off his bicycle, asked if he could take a look at mine, and he fixed it in about thirty seconds.  He had me test it out and I thanked him as we both went our separate ways.  In another 1.79 miles on my bike, I was home.  It was a good day.

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My First Chapter Book and Some Randomly Related Thoughts

Posted on October 17, 2013 by caverns of my mind

As the self-published author of Memoirs of an Ordinary Girl: The Middle-ish Ages, I’ve written a chapter book, which is obviously an accomplishment I’m excited about.  However, when recently looking through my “box of old stuff” (most of you know what I’m talking about- old school work and creations from your past), I found the original chapter book I wrote.

It happened in second grade.  Most of the other kids in my class were terrified of the idea of writing a book, but other than the part where we also had to do our own illustrations, I was stoked!  Yes, I loved writing at least as far back as second grade.  Drawing was something I enjoyed, but I knew I was not talented in that art medium- not like the kid Jesse in my class who drew the most amazing landscapes with depth of field you ever saw by a second-grader.  But even then I was sure my writing abilities made up for my drawing inadequacies.

catsalot

The assignment: Write an illustrated chapter story beginning with, “Lucky me! I was chosen to take the first trip to the planet Cats-A-Lot.”  I threw in weird aliens, a flying cat, and chocolate covered pills for space travel.  Looking back now, I see I could have used an editor, but I was six or seven, so I’m going to let that go now.

green kangaroo

As a YA writer, I also get questions about what kind of books I liked reading when I was a kid.  The first chapter book I read was Judy Blume’s The One in the Middle is the Green Kangaroo and I think I was in third or fourth grade when I read it.  I’m also fairly certain I related to that book even if I wasn’t in the middle.  I remember feeling so mature and accomplished when I told my friends which chapter I was reading.  It was a book picked out of one of those Scholastic book papers we got back in elementary school, the ones where you could also get a free poster of some kind of cute little kitten or puppy if you ordered a certain amount.  I had those hanging all over my walls and doors.

fifth grade

From there I moved on to Cleary’s Ramona books, DeClements’ Nothing’s Fair in Fifth Grade, and then Pascal’s many Sweet Valley Twins books. I also had many hand-me-down books from my older sisters.  I always had a book in progress.  If I was home sick, I read a book.  If I had a bad day, I read a book.  If I had a good day, I read a book.  I couldn’t get enough; I constantly had to get my fix.  They were like drugs for my developing mind, only they grew my brain cells instead of killing them.  Now, more than anything, I want to see my book and future books as being a part of the readers’ memories when they look back and realize how they connected to my beloved Drew.

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How to Like Everybody, Even if You Don’t Know Them Yet

Posted on October 7, 2013 by caverns of my mind

friendship

It’s possible some readers may be offended by what will seem like my oversimplification of a complicated idea, but I don’t care.  Sometimes we are what screws everything up and creates complication; furthermore, wisdom can come in simple ideas, so give it a chance.

I very recently met an older, retired man, let’s call him George, who revealed to me something that revolutionized my thinking.  He was volunteering at a race I was working at and said he loved doing volunteer work because he got to meet so many interesting people.  Ok, so here comes the fortune cookie wisdom.  George said he liked everybody, even people he hadn’t met yet, until they gave him a reason not to.  Pause for a bit here, reread the simple statement, and let it rest on the tip of your mind for a bit.  Then, let it invade your more intimate thoughts.

What does it mean to like everybody, even the people you don’t know yet?

If you are truly honest with yourself you will admit that you probably do not like everybody, especially not strangers, because, well, they are strangers to you.  We fear the unknown.  It’s human nature, so don’t try to lie about it.   The only times I know of when people are automatically accepting of other human beings is when it’s a baby, a celebrity people think they know because they’ve read the check-stand tabloids, or people with common friends who may have come into the picture with a high recommendation from someone whose opinion is respected.

Strangers, true strangers, generally have to work much harder for acceptance.  Why?  Again, the fear of the unknown, personal experiences, or maybe just seeing, or thinking we see, what we don’t like in ourselves in someone else.  We may live in a country with an “innocent until proven guilty” law in the cases of possible crimes committed, but we tend to assume everyone is guilty when it comes to taking a chance and building a relationship.  If only we could get over our past hurts and consider each person a new opportunity for friendship instead of waiting for the moment they will stab us in the back, what a difference it could make. But we’re human, so we are wary; and we are human, so we hurt people.  Maybe we just need to take more chances.  Everyone you let in will hurt you in some way at some point- we cannot help ourselves, whether on purpose or accident- but think of how many more relationships could be formed and all the good that could come from it.

Remember these two things: we are meant to love one another, and to someone else, you are the stranger.

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